DIANA SALIER [18.526]

DIANA SALIER

Compositora, músico, escritora y poeta.

Escribo música, sonidos y palabras en Los Ángeles, CA.

Diana Salier es autora de LETTERS FROM ROBOTS (Night Bomb Press, 2012) y WIKIPEDIA SAYS IT WILL PASS (Deadly Chaps Press, 2011) y editora de NAP. 

MIERDA HE ESTADO TAN SOLA

Recuerdas cuando pasábamos

los sábados bebiendo té

descargando porno

usando el Wi-Fi gratuito

del café

que está bajo tu apartamento

Mierda

he estado

tan sola

Quiero beber té

y descargar porno contigo

usando el Wi-Fi gratis

del café que está

bajo tu apartamento

Traducción: Martín Rangel

SOY UN MONSTRUO DE PELÍCULA REFORMADO 
Y TE AMO DEMASIADO

Antes de que te quedaras ciego

Puse mis manos sobre tus ojos

y prometí protegerte del sol

Estudié el apocalipsis

desde el fondo de un cerco de sábanas

en tu cama

Le di una galleta a cada una de las cosas malas

que estaban sucediendo alrededor de nosotros.

Principalmente se siente como si llevara cuatro meses estando a punto de llorar

principalmente tengo miedo de que te diviertas más sin mí

y principalmente sólo me preocupa que tengas mejor sexo

Mi padre es el rey de los dinosaurios

si te quedas conmigo no van a comerte

Soy un monstruo de película reformado

y te amo demasiado

conozco tus miedos

y no voy a aprovecharme de ellos

Traducción: Martín Rangel

CUANDO SEAMOS VIEJOS EN UNA CUEVA
 ENCENDIENDO FOGATAS

Atravesaste la puerta   afilé todos mis lápices.

Escribí esta lista de supermercado   pensando en ti—

crema de maní huevos tocino mostaza arroz integral.

He estado practicando   para ser tu amante desde el primer grado.

Hago los mejores tratos. Nunca tendrás hambre. Puedo convertir almuerzos de jamón empaquetados al vacío en tazas de pudín durante varias semanas.

Le lanzaría un balón a cualquiera que intentara robar tu bicicleta.

Modifiqué nuestras entradas en ancestry.com   ahora somos mellizos separados al nacer

Puedes pasar la noche en mi casa del árbol después de darme tu consentimiento verbal—un simple SÍ será suficiente.

Hay tantas canciones   que desearía haber escrito

y cuando seamos viejos en una cueva y encendamos fogatas en nuestras pantuflas,

las escribiré por vez primera y tocaré para ti una serie

de nuevas canciones viejas

Traducción: Martín Rangel

I AM A REFORMED MOVIE MONSTER 
AND I LOVE YOU SO MUCH

Before you went blind

I put my hands over your eyes

and promised to block you out the sun

I studied the apocalypse

from behind the blanket barrier

of your bed

I gave a cookie to all the bad things

that were happening around us

Mostly it feels like I’ve been about to cry for four months

mostly I’m afraid you have more fun without me

and mostly I’m just worried you have better sex

My father is king of the dinosaurs

if you stick with me you will not get eaten

I am a reformed movie monster

and I love so much

I know your fears

and will not capitalize on them

in an 8-minute clip from a longer 1 ½ hour porn video

it’s 9 am on wednesday and i’m late for work again. i could make a ham and cheese but instead

i’m watching an older brunette woman go down on a blonde girl while her friend watches from the right side of the frame. the first girl talks too much to really be enjoying anything. i’ve never made a sex tape, and the only time i watched myself i was distracted by my bad hair day. in real life no one looks hot when they’re having sex. when we’re together we look like two stray dogs duking it out over a piece of flank steak. you don’t really eat red meat so you pretend to fight back but then you give in and let me have the flank steak. i say thank you by sitting at your side and licking your face up and down a few times.

in my favorite scene from eternal sunshine of the spotless mind

jim carrey as joel is under a hideous floral print quilt. kate winslet asks him if she’s ugly, but she’s not as ugly as the floral print quilt. she tells him about when she was little and an ugly girl doll named clementine. jim carrey as joel climbs on top of kate winslet and tells her she’s pretty. he kisses the right side of her face. kate winslet says joely don’t ever leave me. in 2004 mark ruffalo and kirsten dunst dance on the bed in a red t-shirt and pink undies. i rewind the one-minute scene and cry every time she says joely don’t ever leave me. my spine is folded and i have a hamburger craving. i make a note in my calendar to remember to forget you — your favorite animal, the golden lion tamarin; your favorite ice cream, lemon cookie straight from the pint-sized container.

in a karaoke bar inside your heart

at rest your heart beats exactly in time with “america” by simon & garfunkel. my voice cracks at the line about the man in the gabardine suit. then again when paul sings i’m empty and aching and i don’t know why. i go off-key and fudge the lyrics and you laugh. i feel your diaphragm contract. when you need a boost i sing only inspirational songs written by powerful female vocalists. i pay the bartender to send a fresh glass of vodka cranberry directly into your small intestine.

When I Go to a Fast Food Restaurant

All The Fast Food Workers Are Calling

Out Your Name

it’s saturday in spring and we meet at a bar to play house. your sunglasses keep me from reading your mind. you say i want to go home and build a fort out of you.

there are two hot girls who look just like you. there are two hot girls who look nothing like you. there is a tall greying woman dancing alone. your sunglasses say look at them they just don’t give a fuck.

i ask if in forty years we will be sixtysomethings among twentysomethings drinking mexican beer and dancing to old soul songs.

i lead you to the bathroom where we lock ourselves in, plant rainforests in the ceiling, and sleep with our eyes open.

later, when the police break the door your friends will ask what you were doing // you will say making bad decisions.

with your walls all around me, let’s build a new city.

cut off my fingers to make weapons for the armory.

The Passport Control Officer

Talks to Batman

state your name and final destination? batman. the ends of the earth.

what have you done today to improve your knowledge? added five photos to my online dating profile. ate a whole green pepper. learned how to say “this is my home” in seventy new languages.

when you left the house did you leave anything behind? there are cats in my bathtub. i had no time to remove them. you might find more if you search the laundry.

before you packed your bags did anyone climb through the window and break your heart? if they did they had no face and walked around barefoot. i set a bear trap and disposed of their naked body.

what are your plans when you arrive at the ends of the earth? sleep in my clothes. take a wife. unload the skeletons from my carry-on luggage.

have you or anyone in your household previously traveled to the ends of the earth? as a boy i went surfing in the pacific ocean. i swam for eighteen hours toward a blue light on the horizon. i returned to the city in a water plane and proclaimed myself a hero.

it is standard procedure to remove all weapons, metal products, and proof of your status as a human being before entering this country.

.